So in the midts of my wonderful life I have been fighting an awful battle on Adam's side of the family. Last fall I turned my sister-in-law Lydia (Adam's brother's wife) into Child Protective Services (CPS). From the time I came into the family she has been extremly physically and mentally abusive to their only child (daughter) Tayla. Lydia grabs Tayla by fist-fulls of hair and jerks her around, she beats her butt with any available objects, i.e. sticks, arrows, foot, etc. amongst several other forms of what she considers "appropriate discipline." She also calls Tayla a lot of awful names, including but not limited to: Bitch, cow, etc. Now let me inform you that Tayla just barely turned 6, two weeks ago. This has been going on most of her life. From a person who I know is not judgemental to any degree told me recently about a situation where Lydia brought Tayla into their deli and ordered food for herself and proceeded to eat it in front of Tayla. When Tayla cried that she was hungry and wanted some food to, Lydia proceeded to back hand her and tell her to "shut the hell up." So even after turning her into CPS she continues to abuse Tayla.
Well the turning point for me turning Lydia in to CPS came when I was informed by a couple of different people that at the campground where everyone camps during hunting season, Lydia bare-bottomed (pull pants and underwear clear down to atleast her knees) Tayla, and proceeded to beat her butt with a carbon arrow, over and over. All the while Tayla is screaming "Mom stop, you hurting my hand" (she kept putting her hand in front of her butt to try and protect it). Her beating her bottom like she did was because Tayla played in the creek after her mom told her not to. On top of all of this everyone person in the ENTIRE side of Adam's family has and had so much to say about how Lydia treats Tayla, and how she mothers her, etc. Everytime Lydia would call her something nasty or beat her, everyone who have something to say amongst themselve but never actually say anything to Lydia or do something about it.
Well in the midst of turning Lydia in, I told one person who I thought I could really trust about me turning Lydia. This person in turn told another person about what I did. This person turned out to be Lydia's best friend and told her all about how it was me who turned her in. Trying to make a long story short... EVERYONE in the ENTIRE FREAKING FAMILY has nothing to say to Lydia. Lydia went around confronting everyone on whether or not they thought I was right, they all coward back pretended like I was crazy and there was nothing wrong in the way she treats Tayla. Also when it all came out everyone was like "JoAnna, I can't believe you turned her in!" or "Why did you turn her in." or "I don't agree with you, but I'm not taking sides." Now the kicker to the whole situation is that everyone of the people who had something to say about how wrong I was for turning her in, had talked about it time and time again about wrong she is and how she needs help. Now to top it all of I've become everyone's black sheep. But they don't just come out and act like I am. They pretend to be all sweet to my face and then when I turn my back it becomes a "Lets trash on JoAnna" party.
When it all came out that it was me who turned Lydia in I wrote her and e-mail trying to explain my reasoning behind it and that I hoped that we could mend bridges, etc. In return I got a nasty e-mail telling me pretty much that I am the scum of the earth and I have no idea what I am talking about and how I am a liar and all this big line of crap.
Now comes the part where I need your opinion. I've tried letting it die from the day it all happened (last november is when she found and it all started) and I wrote her the e-mail to try and fix it. However, time and time again people in the family take it upon themselves to tell me quote on quote "You need to get over your shit and move on in life." Well the funny thing to that is I don't talk to anyone in th family about it, aside from my husband once in a while when something about it comes up. Also in the midst of all this happening all of our friends and family members say they don't care, etc. However, everyone treats me differently and acts as if though I am a threat to their children. I have been contemplating writing a family and friend wide letter to all those involved because I don't know of any other way to try and fix things. On top of that I found out that my dear sweet sister-in-law Lydia is going around town (still to this present day) to everyone making sure they know her side of the story and showing them the e-mail she wrote me, but not the one I wrote her. I wouldn't be concerned with this too much but it could affect my job where I work with disabled children and adults. All in all I am at a loss with the situation and trying to figure out what to do. If you want a very, honest, and accurate description of Lydia's personality just look up narcissism on google and read the signs and symptom section. I am not joking in any regard. I just want someone who isn't involve in it all to tell me what they think my best options are. If it were up to me and how I feel today I would just as soon drive over to Lydia's house and beat the heck out of her. I know this would do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! but it sure seems like it would make me feel a lot better. I really would appreciate honest opinions on the matter. Thanks.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Sunday, March 16, 2008
The Life of Emma Smith
So yesterady I had the amazing opportunity to attend a stake Relief Society activity. It was all about the Prophet Joseph Smith's wife Emma. I just have to say WOW! I feel so ashamed for ever thinking negative of her. I used to judge her so harshly for leaving the church and allowing her children to do so as well. I can not believe how dumb I was about everything.
The way it was set up was there 5 women on the stage, all dressed accordling with the style of the 1800's. They started from the begining of Emma's life and went through to the end of Emma's life. I would most certainly have NOT been up to the task that God required of her.
She lost 5 children, had 8 pregnancies, watched her home be burglarized time and time again. She had to raise all of her children for the most part by herself. The times Joseph was in jail she was forced from her home and had to depend on God's love an protection to provide the food her and her children would need. She had to deal with the mobs and her husband constantly going into hiding. She had to constantly leave her home and possesions.
Then in the ultimate sacrifice she had to feed and house in her own home the men who would be responsible for her husbands death. Having to listen to the messenger come to deliver the news to the guests in her home that "the deed is done" and her husband was dead. She had to deal with the debt incurred by the church because it was all in Joseph's name. She was asked to hand over all of her papers, both church and personal, to the church because it was too hard to decifer what was personal and what was the church's. She chose not to and as a result kept the debt of the church ultimatley resulting in the loss of her home to pay for the debts.
All in all I can not imagine the pain, agony, and suffering her heart had to suffer so that we could be blessed with the church in our lives today. I am so grateful for her amazing strength and the amazing strength she was to our prophet Joseph Smith so he could peform the work of the Lord. I have severe remorse in my heart for ever thinking as harshly of her as I did.
The way it was set up was there 5 women on the stage, all dressed accordling with the style of the 1800's. They started from the begining of Emma's life and went through to the end of Emma's life. I would most certainly have NOT been up to the task that God required of her.
She lost 5 children, had 8 pregnancies, watched her home be burglarized time and time again. She had to raise all of her children for the most part by herself. The times Joseph was in jail she was forced from her home and had to depend on God's love an protection to provide the food her and her children would need. She had to deal with the mobs and her husband constantly going into hiding. She had to constantly leave her home and possesions.
Then in the ultimate sacrifice she had to feed and house in her own home the men who would be responsible for her husbands death. Having to listen to the messenger come to deliver the news to the guests in her home that "the deed is done" and her husband was dead. She had to deal with the debt incurred by the church because it was all in Joseph's name. She was asked to hand over all of her papers, both church and personal, to the church because it was too hard to decifer what was personal and what was the church's. She chose not to and as a result kept the debt of the church ultimatley resulting in the loss of her home to pay for the debts.
All in all I can not imagine the pain, agony, and suffering her heart had to suffer so that we could be blessed with the church in our lives today. I am so grateful for her amazing strength and the amazing strength she was to our prophet Joseph Smith so he could peform the work of the Lord. I have severe remorse in my heart for ever thinking as harshly of her as I did.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
The Blessings of Tuppeware and Organization!
For the past several weeks I have had to re-do a lot of things in life. A major one was re-evaluating Adam's and my diet. I thought this would be fairly easy, yet the more I tried to change our diet the less successful I became. So after living in our house for a year and a half I realized half of my problems was, there was little to zero oragnization in my cupboards or my counter tops. So I began the wonderful feat of trying to reorganize my kitchen cupboards and counter tops.
Well the harder I tried it seemed like I was just making a bigger mess instead of making it neater. So my dear husband and all of his wisdom asked me: "Why don't you just go buy some plastic containers and such? That way you wouldn't have so many odd and end things to try and make fit." So I took his advice and went and bought several, let me empahise SEVERAL plastic containers of varying sizes and began the transfortmation. I only spent about $40 in containers, which may seem like a lot but I would pay that price twice for the peace of mind and organization I have in my kitchen now.
Now I don't have any before pics but below are the after pics. And take my word on it, my cupboards were a combination of several odds and ends place together in no particular order, so if you wanted one thing you would have to pick a shelf and start looking. The other rule I made was that if item "A" that I was pulling out of my cupboard had been in my cupboard more than a year without being touched, I would give it away or throw it away. It was amazing how much junk was in those cupboards that I really didn't need. It also made me more aware about my grocery shopping trips and how useful (unuseful) they really were. So here are the wonderful after pics!
This cupboard is directly to the right of my stove. So I made it my spices, marinades and oil cupboard.
My counter top. I used to just have winco bags sitting on them with all of the dried fruit or fresh fruit in them. But then I bought the containers and it has been so nice. On top of that I finally got a rice cooker and I am hoping it will help make dinner easier to make.
This cupboard is the top half of my big cupboards with most my cans and dried goods in it.
To say the least I have organization in my cupboards and it has made it a lot is easier for me to want to cook dinner. It is still a lot of work getting use to not having the quick and easy options like Rice-A-Roni or any of the other quick and easy dinner options but I know we'll be healthier in the long run for it. Most the time it makes me sick to think of how much MSG and artifical crap we were stuffing into our diet, before it became mandatory that I cut it out. I really do feel lots better not eating any of that artificial junk and surprisingly I am spending less at the grocery store to shop healthy, than I was spending to by that kinda good, preservative filled junk that we ate before. I really think eating healthy is cheaper than not.
Well the harder I tried it seemed like I was just making a bigger mess instead of making it neater. So my dear husband and all of his wisdom asked me: "Why don't you just go buy some plastic containers and such? That way you wouldn't have so many odd and end things to try and make fit." So I took his advice and went and bought several, let me empahise SEVERAL plastic containers of varying sizes and began the transfortmation. I only spent about $40 in containers, which may seem like a lot but I would pay that price twice for the peace of mind and organization I have in my kitchen now.
Now I don't have any before pics but below are the after pics. And take my word on it, my cupboards were a combination of several odds and ends place together in no particular order, so if you wanted one thing you would have to pick a shelf and start looking. The other rule I made was that if item "A" that I was pulling out of my cupboard had been in my cupboard more than a year without being touched, I would give it away or throw it away. It was amazing how much junk was in those cupboards that I really didn't need. It also made me more aware about my grocery shopping trips and how useful (unuseful) they really were. So here are the wonderful after pics!
This cupboard is directly to the right of my stove. So I made it my spices, marinades and oil cupboard.
My counter top. I used to just have winco bags sitting on them with all of the dried fruit or fresh fruit in them. But then I bought the containers and it has been so nice. On top of that I finally got a rice cooker and I am hoping it will help make dinner easier to make. This cupboard is the top half of my big cupboards with most my cans and dried goods in it.To say the least I have organization in my cupboards and it has made it a lot is easier for me to want to cook dinner. It is still a lot of work getting use to not having the quick and easy options like Rice-A-Roni or any of the other quick and easy dinner options but I know we'll be healthier in the long run for it. Most the time it makes me sick to think of how much MSG and artifical crap we were stuffing into our diet, before it became mandatory that I cut it out. I really do feel lots better not eating any of that artificial junk and surprisingly I am spending less at the grocery store to shop healthy, than I was spending to by that kinda good, preservative filled junk that we ate before. I really think eating healthy is cheaper than not.
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